Gentlemen's Lunchtime Association

Like a book club, but with video games.

Gentlemen Discussing E3 2013

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This week – Catsman, Evilagram, Funk, Happyman, Ibanez, Jambalya Bob, Mike, Mitch, Mooglepies, Sef and Yay discuss 2013’s disastrous E3, featuring the press conferences of Microsoft, Nintendo, Sony, EA and Ubisoft. Plus, Moonwalker and the season finale of Vidya Top Picks!

  • 0:00 – Intro
  • 6:38 – Microsoft’s conference
  • 53:31 – Nintendo’s conference
  • 1:40:11 – Sony’s conference
  • 2:24:00 – EA’s conference
  • 2:43:45 – Ubisoft
  • 2:54:54 – The Video Game Book Club – with Moonwalker
  • 3:07:50 – Vidya Top Picks – Season Finale

Seanie

No introductions this time?

On June 20, 2013 at 1:14 am

Seanie

Oh wait nevermind

On June 20, 2013 at 1:15 am

Yalyn V.

Oh yeah. If you like to know about the gam-I mean application, that is Art Academy, it is complete garbage. Get Colors! instead. It’s like 7$ instead of 20$, 30$, or 50$. You’ll thank me later.

Also my podcast app and I thought that the podcast ends in 3:17:35 then after the long pause, boom, Evilagram! ooooooh spooki@ lulz

On June 20, 2013 at 3:56 am

Riam

Cats, Okami on Wii did use the motion controls for the brush. They were pretty shit, but they were still there.

On June 21, 2013 at 4:26 am

Jambalaya Bob

Yu spelled my name wrong yeh cheeky cunt.

On June 21, 2013 at 3:40 pm

Catsman

It used them, but it didn’t use the pointer controls. Most Wii games used the IR sensor to basically draw a straight line from the Wii remote and put a pointer where it intersects your TV screen. In RAD’s port, the direction you point the wii remote has VIRTUALLY NOTHING to do with where the pointer actually appears on the screen. What’s worse, the system was about 5x more sensitive to horizontal motion than it was to vertical motion, which led to hundreds upon hundreds of failed, flat circles.

It gets worse though. In order to attack, you have to flick the wii remote. It’s basically luck as to whether it’ll pick this up or not. A combo in Okami requires you to attack in a very specific rhythm, and the huge amounts of input lag and general finickiness mean that either you use the beads most of the game or you get your ass beat in every fight. It’s that bad.

It gets worse though. Dodging is controlled by waving the nunchuck from left to right.

Okay, just imagine doing that. Say you’re playing Zelda. Every time you want to roll, you have to wave the nunchuck. Sounds okay right? Skyward sword did it, and it worked fine there.

WELL IT FUCKING DOESN’T IN OKAMI, BECAUSE THEY MADE IT SO THAT YOU ROLL IN THE FUCKING DIRECTION YOU MOVE THE NUNCHUCK, REGARDLESS OF WHICH DIRECTION YOU’RE FACING. AND IF YOU MOVE IT TO THE LEFT, MOVING IT BACK TO THE NEUTRAL POSITION WILL CAUSE YOU TO FUCKING ROLL RIGHT BACK TO WHERE YOU WERE.

I could go on about this port. The fact that they’re using the PS2’s filtered cutscenes, but they removed the beautiful paper filter from the in-game graphics. The IGN watermark they left on the boxart. The fact that they fucking removed the entire credits sequence from the end of the game, literally leaving all the people who actually made the game uncredited. Okami is the worst port of any game I have ever played. The Wii was literally MADE for this game, and yet they managed to fuck it up in every way imaginable.

And yet, Okami’s brilliance still seems to shine through.

On June 21, 2013 at 10:59 pm

Dongs

Will GYP ever come back?
Or will you at least add RSS to this site here so I can see when’s podcast?
Man, I’ll miss GYP if it’s gone, I liked the other podcast.

On June 23, 2013 at 4:38 am

jamie kerr

Does Chris need a hug? What he has to say is great, But he always seems feed up with everything

On June 26, 2013 at 4:20 am