Gentlemen's Lunchtime Association

Like a book club, but with video games.

Doddskipedia

This is Doddski. I have known him for almost 6 years. During this time, he has dispensed some of the most indispensable advice, some of the shiniest peals of wisdom, some of the sagest reasoning that I have ever heard. I feel as though it would be a valuable service to society to share this wisdom, rather than hoarding it all to myself.

“If you don’t like The Room, you don’t know shit about philosophy.”

“I invited a homeless guy to a house party. It wasn’t my house.”

“I wouldn’t masturbate into my computer. But then again, what do we have CD drives for?”

“If I had millions of sex, I would sell them on cassette tape. That way people would be able to listen to them in their cars. Cassex tapes.”

“Back in 1986, ducking wasn’t invented. Pink Floyd invented it on stage. The military later adopted it for use in combat, and it became part of our culture.”

“I want to buy a PSU with traditional Japanese transistors.”

Devon is sort of like the foot fetish of the UK, whereas Glasgow is more like the face-trampling fetish. Cornwall isn’t part of the foot. Cornwall is just the toes.

“My grandparents are from Ireland. Maybe they’re related to me?”

“I’ve heard that you’re more likely to get a job if you go to the interviewer’s house and take a shit in their toilet.”

“Holy shit, I just thought I lost a five pence piece up my nose! But it was on the floor.”

“I can think of much better things to put in orphans.”

“Now and then, I buy a taco, and then I have sex with it just for you.”

“I’m pretty sure that willy wonka, like, invented genetic engineering. Because he had that goose that laided those eggs.”

“It’s like bread, but it has little bread people in it, and they make little bread houses.”

“perhaps chairs have been around since the dawn of time, like the pyramids”

“Did you just call me black? Is it because I’m black that you’re calling me black? That’s racist.”

“Red light? There’s no time for red light! There’s law to be fought! Crime, even.”

“It’s called dutch waifus. They really do exist, and they really do rip your dick off.”

“If you had a sentient robot, would you let it give you a hand job? It also runs the risk of pulling your dick off.”

“Have sex with dogs and be depressed? Those sound like two opposite ends of the spectrum for me!”

“‘No’ isn’t fun to hear. Especially if you’re trying to rape someone. Although I guess if they said yes that would ruin the whole point of it.”

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